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Sh*t Hotel Guests Say

January 13, 2012 at 12:24 PM | by | ()

If you haven't seen it yet, the latest viral trend is Sh*t Girls Say from girls to black girls to white girls talking to black girls to girls talking to gay guys, girls talking to personal trainers and so on.

Since it's Friday, we thought we'd put together our own list of Sh*t Hotel Guests Say when staying in hotels. Sorry, you'll have to do without a visual of one of the HotelChatter guys in drag. But feel free to submit your own Sh*t Hotel Guests Say video!

· Can I get an upgrade to a suite?

· Ooo, minibar!

· $7 for Pringles???

· Do the movie titles show up on the bill?

· Why is it so cold in this room?

· What do you mean, there is no door to the bathroom?

· Why are these sheets so scratchy?

· $15 a day for WiFi? My ass!

· Ewww, a hair in the tub!

· Hi Room Service? Can I get a cheeseburger and fries? Oh and a Coke?

· Meet me downstairs for drinks. Even though I'm a guest, I can't get into the rooftop club.

· [To the concierge] Can you get me reservations tonight for the hottest restaurant in town?

· I forgot a toothbrush. Can you send one up?

· It's 2am. Why is the alarm clock going off?

· No housekeeping. Please go away. But can I get more towels?

· Should I tip the maid?

· This room needs more outlets.

· Why is the TV right above the desk?

· Ugh. This shampoo sucks.

· Where is the full-length mirror?

· Can I get a late check-out?

· If I hadn't booked this room on Hotwire for under a $100, I probably wouldn't come back.

Got more Sh*t Hotel Guests Say quotes to add? Do it in comments below!

[Photo: Corinna Witt/HotelChatter Flickr Pool]

Archived Comments:

Here's some more..

  • " I did not use the minibar last night"  (said after all alcohol is missing from said minibar)
  • " I  did not order that movie!"
  • "I know someone who works for _ hotel - can I get a discount?"

Some more from Facebook

From our Facebook page:

· What's the password for the wi-fi?

· Why does breakfast end at 10am?

· I only slept on these sheets for one night and go weeks without changing them at home. But, can you change them? Thanks.

· Why don't you have a bar?

Even more from Facebook

· I didn't know you guys were renovating (stated in confirmation)

· Are you stupid?

· Imbecile

· I'm a platinum and didn't get a suite?! I better get a discount.

· I'm a platinum get me ice.

· My tv remote didn't work I want a discount.

· (clerk) Photo id and credit card.
(Guest) I don't have id or credit card

· What channel is Dancing with the Stars on?? (Note: This is our fave submission by far!)

· What happen to the yellow pages in the room? (2AM Call To The Front Desk)

More Sh*t

From our Facebook page:

· What do you mean I don't get free breakfast?

· im still not satisfied so do i get a free room, wine or something?"

· if thats an extra cost i don't want it

· what thread count are these towels?

· does the kettle turn itself on?

Love ...

  • ' I'm collecting pens, may I get one? '

  • ' Why's my ten-year old daugther not allowed to use the sauna? '

  • ' Why Wi-Fi isn't complimentary? '

  • ' We've to pay for parking? '


"Shampoo/conditioner in one? Ugh."

"You can't guarantee us adjoining rooms? I want a discount."

"It's raining. What am I supposed to do today?"

"It's 7pm on Valentine's Day, and you can't get me a dinner reservation for 7:30? What kind of concierge are you?"

Surf's Up

I'm not coming back here, the surf's too noisy
A. I'll ring God and ask him to turn it down.

Some More..

*"I understand check-in is at 3pm, I just want to let you know I'll be in at 5:30... please don't cancel my room"
*[5 star downtown hotel] "The Holiday Inn Express is offering $99 a night with breakfast, can you match this".
*"I'm not paying for my phone charges; I have a cell phone- why would I use the phone in the room."
*GUEST: "I can't have a smoking room; I'm alergic, I'm sensitive and I could die."

F.DESK: "we are 100% non-smoking"

GUEST: "I've heard that before."
"why do I have to give you my credit card?  I gave it to you when I made the reservation".
"I need a high floor, but dont want to be close to the roof-top bar"
"I'm Mr. Johnson and work with company XYZ, we stay here all the time..."


- I should be upgraded and given free stuff. I plan to travel here weekly (never to be seen again)

-I'm really upset. why is it raining?

-The ocean doesnt look as blue as last time. whats going on?

-Where should I eat?
 (me)What kinda food would u like?
 I dont know...
 (me)there are 200 places with in a 15min walk    
Well I'm not sure whats good?

-(me) Welcome to the W
(guest)Is this the Westin?
(me)No this is the W
(guest) You mean W isnt Westin?

Ugh, memories!

"I'm an HHonors Diamond member and I am calling for the Diamond member directions to the property."  (so, basically, if you are blue, silver, or even gold, we will not provide the SHORTEST/FASTEST possible route?)

"This is NOT a real Westin."

GOD forbit there are MULTIPLE locations in a single city!!

"What do you mean I'm at the WRONGE [Hilton Grand, Embassy Suites, Double Tree, Hampton Inn, Sheraton, etc]?  You mean there is more than one?"

It's 1:00am on a sold out, three day weekend in Vegas...

"You did this to me on purpose!  Because I booked on priceline, you gave me the "priceline" room, above an air handler!!"  It really isn't a big conspiracy, next time don't show up so late!

"I booked on priceline and they didn't ask for my SPG number so I'll get my points..."

"What do you mean you are sold out?  I booked here!  I need a room and won't leave until I have keys to a room."  What part of sold out is confusing?

When I worked at the Westin Casuarina in Vegas, I once had a guest ask one of my front desk associates if the rooms on the top floor were "cooler."  The associate said, "um, ya...  Oh, um, wait, NO!  Actually, they are hotter because they are closer to the sun."  Sometimes it isn't the sh*t hotel guests say, but what the associates say, and BELIEVE, that is really a kick in the pants!!!

Everyday, Every way

FD Person: "Good afternoon, thank you for calling the Fairfield Inn & Suites this is Lisa, how may I assist you?
Caller: "Is this the Fairfield Inn & Suites?  (duh!!!)

Guest- "I need directions to your hotel in Atlanta, I live in California! (huh???? Are you serious?)

Guest: "Incidentals? I've NEVER been charged incidentals at any other hotel, and I travel all the time!"

one more to add

Guest "im looking to call another guest i dont know what room"

Me "sure whats the name of the guest"

Guest "I dont know, the first name is sean, he has dark hair, kinda tall"