Hotel workers walk in on threesomes, twosomes and, most commonly, onesomes, and must extricate themselves as delicately as possible because, make no mistake, the guest’s opinion of the situation holds quite a bit of weight.
It might be claimed, for instance, that the housekeeper failed to knock loudly enough, hence the hotel is at fault for this terrible embarrassment. (It is never mentioned that the guest was enjoying Internet pornography while wearing noise-canceling headphones.)
So ... use the bolt lock! Housekeepers are begging you. Minibar attendants are begging you. Bellmen are begging you. Your wife is begging you. Till then, the housekeeper must simply keep her head down, apologize uncomfortably and make a quick and determined exit. No service today.
And we thought getting caught in our (tightly knotted) robes was mortifying! But seriously, that might be the best piece of advice ever. Heed it.
Some more good news for housekeepers to come out of the terrible DSK incident? Panic Buttons. Tnooz reports that Rory Lancman, a Queens, N.Y. assemblyman wants to introduce panic buttons for housekeepers that would alert hotel security or another safety monitoring station that the housekeeper needs help.
In a perfect world, housekeepers wouldn't have to deal with sexually depraved guests. Also, hotel mattresses would be lighter than cotton candy. But this world is far from perfect. Panic buttons sound reasonable. And oh, don't forget to tip. Now more than ever.
P.S. Bernard-Henri Levy? Don't ever use the word chambermaid again. Ever.
[Photo: Mynameisharsha/Flickr]



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