We're guessing this is a package aimed at couples, but obviously you single ladies can appreciate it solo. And yes, you do get a bona fide dildo. In fact, you'll receive a Rabbit, that two-pronged vibrator made famous by Sex and the City.
If you want to claim your Rabbit, book either the Chelsea room with its V-Day-appropriate red walls and a ruby-colored tub that lights up, the Westminster room with its two side-by-side claw-foot tubs or the Richmond suite with its own spa-like air bath.
The self-pleasuring package also includes lubricant, condoms, chocolate treats and, inexplicably, U.K.'s Fentimans ginger beer.
To get under the duvet with a new dildo, it'll cost you $250 a night. The package is available throughout February, in case you want to come back for more.
[Photo: Woodstocker Inn]