Chocolate at The Ritz-Carlton, Key Biscane: The hotel's beachfront restaurant Cantina Beach is laying out a 20-foot chocolate buffet for just $22. Should you want to ruin your appetite for dessert, there's also a $75 tasting menu—to go with the usual list of 85 tequilas on offer.
Sex toys at myhotels in the UK: The three myhotels, in Bloomsbury, Brighton and Chelsea are offering guests an incredibly thorough package of Coco de Mer whatnots, including "Coco de Mer's signature blindfold and unique lubes and massage oils to a few tools to encourage some sweet naughtiness [including a] feather tickler and restraints." Prices are from £199 ($318), with Brighton starting at £235.
Classic V-Day at the Pavillon de la Reine: Leave it to Paris to come up with a classically romantic stay, with this €550 ($745) package that includes a spa treatment, bottle of champers, macarons, and a full breakfast for two in the morning for just a bit more than the regular room rate.
The over-the-top play at Thailand's Sarojin: Do you really love the one you're with? This resort in Khao Lak, near Phuket, has a six-day renewal of vows package that's probably not for everyone. Included? Six nights, a dedicated wedding planner, a "wedding" ceremony, a private five-course dinner for two set in the nearby jungle, and sundry other extras. The whole deal rings in at about $4,400. Hey it's not $250,000, so jump on it, k?

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