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The 10 MOST INSANE HOTEL PACKAGES EVER

10. Marco Island Marriott's $175,000 Getaway: Back in 2006, this Florida Marriott decided to celebrate its $175 million renovation with a seven-night $175,000 getaway package that included a two-bedroom suite; unlimited food and beverage, private chartered jet into Marco Island Executive Airport, Mercedes convertible rental car, personal butler service, helicopter ride and private dive in Key Largo, private airboat ride in Florida Everglades, seven-course private dinner at chef's table, $5,000 Marco resort gift shop credit, $10,000 gift certificate to Naples 5th Ave/3rd Ave South and a private sunset cruise on a yacht. Of course, you could have remodeled your house with that money but um, getaways are more important?

9. Mandarin Oriental's Fifth Anniversary Package: For 55 million yen (about $672,150) you and 500 of your friends will have full run of the place, along with a special cocktail party and use of the spa for one day. While drinks and meals at the hotel restaurant are included those spa treatments appear to be extra charges. So make sure your 500 friends know this before you have them check-in.

8. The Poetry Inn's Ultimate Birthday Bash with Thomas Keller: This package had foodies drooling but that mess was quickly sopped up when the $60,000 price tag was revealed. Yet for the richies that can swing it, a birthday bash at the Poetry Inn includes accommodations for you and nine friends; a private dinner prepared by famous chef Thomas Keller and his French Laundry staff on your birthday night; a second night of dining at one of Keller's other restaurants, a casual prepared lunch from Team Keller; departing gifts of six bottles of Poetry Cabernet Sauvignon, the flagship wine produced from Cliff Lede Vineyard; and for the big birthday winner, a bottle of first growth Bordeaux from your birth year. Sorry, no cures for food and wine comas included.

7. The Sydney Hilton's Million Dollar Package: Despite introducing the package over two years, ago The Sydney Hilton is still holding out that someone will fork over $1 million for this package which includes a two-night stay in the Master Suite (which is the whole of level 42); one night for 100 friends in rooms on the executive floors; a party at the hotel's Zeta bar, a fancy chef-prepared meal; a new tailored suit; a 2.16 carat pear-shaped diamond ring and a $455,000 Bentley convertible. If it makes you feel any better, a million Aussie dollars is not quite a million in USD.

6. Emirates Palace Million Dollar Package: We really wouldn't expect anything less than gold and gluttony coming out of the United Arab Emirates but this package really goes all out. For $1,025,000, two people get a seven-night stay at the hotel that includes accommodations in a three-bedroom suite; a personal butler on call 24 hours a day; private jet excursions; all food and drink; chauffeured rides in a $410,000 Maybach supercar; rounds of golf, a desert island tour; a deep-sea fishing expedition; the chance to create your very own perfume scent and some actual sporting guns from Holland & Holland with special arrangements to get the "goodies" through customs. Ugh. Greed is good?

5. Ritz-Carlton's Lundi Gras Ride of a Lifetime Package: Who wouldn't want to ride in a float in the New Orleans Lundi Gras parade (which happens a day before Mardi Gras)? So the Ritz-Carlton had the right idea last year offering guests the chance to star in a parade float for a mere $25,000. That price tag also included a two-night stay in a hotel suite; theme-appropriate costumes; a videographer to document the 12-hour festivities; limo service for 48 hours; and the cherry on top of the ice cream sundae--a chance to ride alongside Harry Connick, Jr. during the parade.

4. Hyatt Regency DC's Presidential Entourage Package: President Barack Obama's inauguration saw a spike of inaugural packages some of which were absolutely insane. For $75,000, the Hyatt Regency in DC offered guests a night in the bullet-proof Presidential Suite, limo service, a private reception, spa treatments, a private tour of D.C.'s monuments, two dinners with wine pairings, along with eight tickets to the inaugural parade and scarves and gloves from Thomas Pink to keep themselves warm. But that's paltry compared to the Omni's inauguration package below.

3. Omni Shoreham's 44th Commander-in-Chief Package: For $440,000 The Omni Shoreham offered high-rolling guests four nights in the presidential suite with private jet arrival; a $44,000 jewelry shopping spree; entry for four guests to the inaugural festivities; a personal photographer and a personal concierge and chauffeur available 24 hours a day. The package was so cracked out it even included a new puppy of the guest's choice which was thankfully canceled at the last minute after animal-rights groups complained. God, we don't know if we can handle what DC hotels will put together for the 45th president.

2. The Taj Boston's $6 Million Suite: For six million big ones you can get private round-trip jet transportation for two from Boston to anywhere in the world; a night in the presidential suite, which includes 24-hour butler service; limo service to and from the hotel; a new Jaguar XJ with lifetime valet parking at the Taj; plus your name on a new theater at the renowned Boston Conservatory. That honor will get you ticket to a grand-opening event, the ribbon-cutting ceremony and all Boston Conservatory shows for life. The package actually is being offered this weekend. Any takers?

1. Hard Rock San Diego's Ultimate High Roller Holiday Gift: For $1 million, a high rolling guest could rent out the entire hotel for him/her and their friends for one night which included the following: Private jet transport for 10 VIPS from a "select" destination in the United States to San Diego with limos to the Hard Rock Hotel; Rooms for 420 friends and their plus 1s; Private Dining at the Nobu sushi restaurant downstairs; a VIP Bash at the Float Lounge; Open bar, food and a celebrity DJ and lastly, a professional photographer to document every moment of this insanity.

[Top photo: Aresauburn/Flickr; Ring/HotelChatter; Thomas Keller/Phoodie.com; Sporting Gun/Holland and Holland; Puppy/HotelChatter; and Hard Rock San Diego composite/HotelChatter]