HotelChatter

We shacked up at the hotel one night shortly after its opening and it was a cluster you-know-what for the records. The non-stop stream of unfavorable press and local word-of-mouth hasn’t exactly inspired us to return. (Ed. Note: The writer stayed here on the hotel's dime while on assignment for another publication.) Here’s how it all shook out:

We loved the actual hotel rooms – the views of Elliott Bay are truly spectacular and we can even find it within ourselves to get over the unavoidable, eye sore of the Public Storage signage. The décor is bit more mod than your usual FS properties and we love the emphasis on local, Pacific Northwest artists. That’s pretty much where the love ends.

We cannot forgive the major typos/errors on the wine list at ART. The night we stayed, it featured a $60+ wine by the glass from Ridge Vineyards that didn’t actually exist. Upon inspection of the bottle, the vintage and varietal didn’t even match what was being listed. At $60+ a glass, there’s no excuse for not knowing what you’re pouring. Hey FS, here’s where the expertise of a hired sommelier would have come in handy (there was not a dedicated sommelier on staff at the time of our visit).

Rewind a few weeks prior to when we had a rather mediocre lunch with the hotel’s PR powers-that-be. Partitioned TV dinner style of service was kinda cute, while the paintbrush to “paint” sauce on your dishes (a nod to the nearby Seattle Art Museum) was downright dumb. Thank sweet Jesus, we hear this hokey DIY concept has been banned.

Anyway, we thought we’d give ART another chance and try a few appetizers, but screeched to a neck-breaking stop after the very first one. A simple pasta with truffles and porcinis was bland and boring. At Four Seasons’ prices (and on our budget), there is no room to take risks (and this dish is truly a no-brainer, in our book), so we quickly sashayed to Black Bottle for reliably tasty wine and small bites.

Complimentary town car service that was supposed to run until 11p.m. left us stranded in Belltown at 10:30p.m. The next day, steam and sauna rooms in both the men and women’s changing rooms at the spa weren’t fully functional. There was confusion over the bill for our couples’ massage (that took an inordinate amount of time to sort out), and then when we’d finally had our fill of sub-par service, we got locked out of our room (both keys disabled after we’d been okayed for a late check out), which immediately negated any positive affects of aforementioned massage.

We wish we could chalk it all up new hotel jitters, but you know what – it’s THE Four Seasons and you gotta work that stuff out before you open your doors for business. So. Very. Disappointing. On the upside, we hear the hotel service staff has improved drastically.

The bottom line is, as a Seattleite, we wish we had another fine dining option to add to our very limited roster. We can live without impromptu overnight getaways and L’Occitane bathroom products, but had really hoped for some culinary talent that could wrap their head around (and live up to) Four Seasons standards. Sears so isn’t it.