An Open Letter to Dennis Rodman Regarding Miami Hotels

May 12, 2009 at 9:11 AM | by Jenna | 0 Comments

Here is a photo of Regis and Kelly at the once-super-sexy, now-attempting-to-be-fam-friendly Fontainebleau Resort in Miami Beach. After its billion-dollar renovation, the megaresort ditched the dated look and emerged looking super sexy — and at first, it was model-friendly (the hotties flocked to the hotel for the official grand opening, which is sort of your jam, we understand), but as the hotel attempts to reposition itself as more family-friendly, well, these are the hotties you're gonna be ogling now. We think that might be good for you.

Yesterday, we learned that you — and we know you have had some major issues with drinking and touchin' all up on people in hotels lately — had hit up the Gansevoort South and had maybe not gotten the memo that you're not a JT-status celeb and you and the entourage had walked out on a $1K resto bill.

And, um, we're not sure how this is possible, but Page Six is reporting that you and your entourage tried to do it again the next night.

Per the Post:

THE night after Dennis Rodman and his entourage reportedly walked out on a $1,000 bill at the Gansevoort South in Miami -- a claim he denied -- the former NBA great and 10 friends pulled the same trick at restaurant Philippe at the same hotel, Page Six has learned. "He was so wasted he couldn't carry a sentence," said one witness. After consuming $1,500 worth of food and drinks, "Dennis sneaks, or I should say stumbled, out of the restaurant.

A staffer noticed and was able to hit up some members of the entourage for some dolla dolla bills, but alright, Rodman: if you want to not get sued or thrown out of hotels or what have you, maybe you can relocate from the somewhat-debauchery-friendly Gansevoort party-ish hotel to the Fontainebleau to get your stuff together. Really. It would be good for you. And look at it this way: if a gigantic resort can reposition itself to be more fam-friendly, we might suggest that you go ahead and do the same "repositioning" and make yourself, um, society-friendly. Take a cue from the Fontainebleau.

Namaste,
HC.

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