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Express Check-Out :: Hotel Spas Target Your "Cottage Cheese"

It's not just Mischa Barton who cries over cellulite.  As beach season approaches, some women are taking a long, hard look at their behinds and thighs and thanking dog they can do it without the paparazzi snapping away.  But there's a slew of hotel spas jumping on the "cottage cheese" bandwagon, with all kinds of therapies, treatments, and wraps to zap those dimpled derrieres. Here's just a sampling of what's available:

· The Topnotch Resort & Spa in Stowe, Vermont, has just rolled out something called Dermawave therapy, a needle-free series of electrical pulses that targets the loose fat cells and tissues of your dermis.   A 30-minute session is US$325 (although they carefully point out that  eight to ten sessions are recommended, but real results can be seen after five or six treatments.)

· The Spa at Estancia La Jolla offers what's called The Estancia Cellulite Treatment Wrap -- we're envisioning women being swaddled in a giant roll of Saran, but then again, probably not.  Their website didn't offer a price for this treatment on their online menu, but a gentleman at the Spa tells us it's $125 for 50 minutes.

· The Paris Las Vegas Spa by Mandara offers the "amazing" Ionithermie anti-cellulite treatment.  Indulge in their "Cellulite Reduction Program." A single treatment is $200, three for $550, and five for $875.  (Or you can opt for their 50-minute "Elemis Cellutox Aroma Spa Ocean Wrap" for $130, and then get a full-body spray tan afterwards for $75. It is Vegas, after all.)

· Bliss Spas, located in many W Hotel outposts including Chicago, Los Angeles, Dallas, and San Francisco (with another one set to open in The W Scottsdale) offers the most reasonably priced treatments in the bunch, in our humble opinion. Called "high thighs" (yes, it's lower cased), they'll administer some "lymphatic drainage" and "toxin-tackling orange peel skin-wringing rub" to your butt cheese for 60 minutes, for a cool $100.