HotelChatter

HOTELCHATTER'S CELEBRITY HOTEL REPORT CARD

DOWNTOWN HOTEL starring Robert DeNiro

· Opening Date:
Bobby's Tribeca hotel project was announced back in July 2004 and several potential opening dates have flown by. On the bright side, the building has been constructed. Unfortunately it looks like an "overbaked shit cookie."

The newest opening date is sometime in 2007.

· Memorable Quote:
DeNiro's partner said the hotel would be designed for people who have to relocate to New York for a period of months -- such as actors making a movie in the city.

· Grade:
C, for opening delays and an off-putting exterior.

LAS RAMBLAS starring George Clooney

· Opening Date:
Clooney's Vegas project didn't even go straight to video. Instead, as they say in the movie biz, this one got shelved. The plan was plagued by heavy construction costs and Clooney's purported penchant for mandatory jackets.

· Memorable Quote:
Clooney on Larry King trying to summarize the already flailing project:

Las Ramblas, after the street in Barcelona, because there is going to be a street up and down, it is a big project, everyone put on a jacket when Rosy sang, I remember going to the airport and putting on a tie.

· Grade:
F for failing, obviously.

SQUIRRELY ACRES starring Richard Gere

· Opening Date:
Unknown. Gere landed in court last summer in Bedford, NY where this planned nine-room inn is to be built. Apparently, the initial plans didn't allow for handicapped access.

· Memorable Quote:
None so far from Richard himself, although his partner said the place will have a restaurant and a yoga studio.

· Grade:
D for not making it wheel-chair friendly, for being boring and for an awful name.

NICKY O HOTELS starring Nicky Hilton

· Opening Date:
This project crashed and burned way worse than Clooney's. Where do we begin? With the hype last summer about Nicky getting into the "family business" or with the lawsuits the heiress now faces?

· Memorable Quote:
Nizar Idrisi, who believes Nicky took credit for his hotel designs said this about Nicky's behavior during a meeting about the hotel:

It was a very important meeting. We were all going over stuff and Nicky was just out there swimming in the pool with one of her friends that came down from New York. Every so often she would look over at us and wave.

· Grade:
F, 'nuff said.

FAIRMONT TAMARACK HOTEL starring Andre Agassi and Steffi Graff:

· Opening Date:
2009. Andre Agassi and wife Steffi Graff are co-owners of the Fairmont Hotel & Residences within the Tamarack Ski Resort in Idaho. The project was announced in August 2005 and since retiring last summer, Agassi got more time to devote to developing the hotel's active outdoor lifestyle.

· Memorable Quote:
The family-oriented Agassi said:

"Tamarack is the perfect location for anyone interested in taking a little time out of their lives to get away or spend quality time with their family.

· Grade:
B, by far the exception for a celebrity hotel. The plans seem solid but 2009 is so far off.

CHATEAU LA RUE starring Tori Spelling and husband:

· Opening Date:
The opening gala was held March 3 and the inn was expected to open sometime this week. But Tori is about to have her first child any minute now so who knows when it really will. Also, Tori might be hard-pressed to find guests to agree to be filmed for her reality show, "Tori and Dean: Inn Love."

· Memorable Quote:
From Tori's MySpace blog about an "unwanted guest" in her B&B's plumbing:

I had to give "McSteamy" kudos here...this was a two ton turd that seemed invincible. It coiled in ways I've never seen a snake do before.Good for him for having such a well balanced fiber filled diet but this brown beast scared the crap out of me! And, I'm NOT shit shy.

· Grade:
B for renovating the place (although Tupperware outfitted the entire kitchen) but a D, for making it the subject of a reality show.