Thus the first step in finding a good hotel room in or around Bariloche is to insure you put safe distance between you and the coachloads of horny youngsters. (It's not the pheromones that get on your nerves, it's the endless Bob Marley.) This is only a danger if you're staying in one of the larger, budget hotels. Check in advance.
Next decision: to stay in Bariloche itself or in one of the numerous, and often lovely, lodgings that fringe the lake? (Did we mention the lake? You're going to love the lake.) The pros of staying in town are that you have easy access to excursions, amenities, good bars and restaurants, Mr Hatchet 2007 qualification heats, etc. The pros of staying outside town are that the accommodation is more interesting, the scenery more, er, scenic, and the overall vibe more - how can we put it? - 'Patagonic'.
Here are our top picks:
In Bariloche city
"One of the best known 3-star hotels in the city with 25 years of activity" says the Carlos, rather underselling itself. We think this is a cracking little budget hotel, with double rooms maxing out at 50 dollars. A room at the overrated and stupidly named Dazzler will cost you four times as much. That's because it's 'slick' and 'minimalist', i.e. you have to ask the front desk if you want a chair in your room. Like all hotels in the region, the Carlos promises you 'regional delicacies' for breakfast. This means jam.
Another good budget option (as you've probably guessed, most of the upscale choices are out of town) whose blood-red facade glows at night, making it easy to locate when drunk. Nice clean rooms in earthy colours; very friendly, helpful staff.
Lovely little B&B with twelve rooms and an attractive garden. Easy access to both the lake shore and the town centre, so perfect for those who want the best of both worlds. Sweet, eccentric owners who seem to speak about 15 languages between them.
Our favourite Bariloche hostel, run by a team of very friendly and slightly odd people. All manner of energy-sapping activities can be arranged. Less party oriented then the nearby Tango Inn, but if you want to stay up all night, every night, why book any accommodation at all?
Outside Bariloche
We were pretty harsh about the BA Design Suites. We'll give this link in the chain a bit more love, but with qualifications. It's a very attractively tricked-out hotel, within easy reach of the town centre but with great views of the lake through the ceiling-to-floor windows. But the comments on TripAdvisor confirm some of our own misgivings: The service lacks expertise and professionalism, some of the jacuzzis are just big hot tubs, and the overall experience fails to live up to the hype. File under 'not as good as it could have been.'
Aside from BA's Alvear Palace, this is probably the best known hotel in Argentina. The name - pronounced 'jhow jhow' - is taken from the language of the indigenous Mapuche and means 'incredibly expensive'. Expect to pay at least 1,000 dollars per night for a decent suite with a lake view. It's a magnificent pile, though, a hillside chateau built in 1940 by Argentina's most celebrated architect, Alejandro Bustillo. The restaurant, health club and golf course are all first rate. Don't turn up without an Argyll sweater and a permatan. Very popular with honeymooners, which may explain why the rooms are so well soundproofed.
Unlike lesser mortals, we travel writers are known for our unquenchable thirst for Knowledge and our insatiable appetite for exhaustive Research, so we can tell you that Aldebaran is the brightest star in the Taurus system and was name checked in the Rolling Stones' '2,000 Light Years from Home'. On terra firma it's one of the best of the Bariloche lakeside lodgings, hidden in a forest on the secluded San Pedro Peninsular. There are ten suites, each an artful blend of rustic and modern and each close enough to the water to let you hear the waves lapping on the shingle. Named after one star, we give it five. (Snappy ending or what?)
Run by the wonderful Evelyn and Marcelo, this is one of our favourite estancias in Argentina. Don't be put off by the website which bangs on rather too much about 'personal development' and 'emotional revitalisation', etc. There's a bit of Kum Ba Yah action, but it's easily sidestepped. Focus your chakra on the outstanding accommodation, the delicious food and - sorry about all these flaky adjectives, it's getting late - the mind-blowing views.
Best of the rest Cabañas Villa Huinid, Peñon del Lago, La Cascada, Hotel Tunquelén
In the next exciting installment of our Patagonia guide we'll be getting our feet a little muddier and exploring the rest of the stunning Lakes region
by
MattyC
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