Cubicle Dreamin': Necker Island
Cubicle Dreamin' is a feature in which we ask the hotel mavens to take some time out of their busy work day, surf the Internet, and tell us what hotel they wish they could beam themselves to right that very second--all on the slave driving companies dime, of course. Oh, like these people aren't surfing aimlessly anyway--at least now their purposeless clicking will be cobbled together into useful hotel stories--we hope. Have a destination hotel you are just dying to leave your cube for? Send the story our way.
In this episode, Hotel Maven Annie 007 let's us know where she would go when money ain't a thang and you got your own helicopter to travel in. Enjoy.
When it comes to flights of fancy about faraway hotels and luxury accommodations, nobody ever thinks "Five-star service on a private island owned by Richard Branson, with all the amenities money can buy."
They think, "Outdoor throne."
Crown yourself "porcelain goddess" on Necker Island, Sir Richard's exclusive resort paradise, just 15 minutes by boat from Virgin Gorda (or, if you're in a tearing hurry to relax, arrive in style by high speed boat or helicopter).
You and 26 of your bestest, closest friends can have the whole freaking place all to yourself - or you and your disgustingly lucky significant other can roam the empty hallways and take advantage of the extra closet space -- for just $19,000 a day.
For the privileged few for whom money is no object, you gotta go here. It has butler, maid, and cook service - a full staff to fulfill your every whim, whenever you're feeling whimsical. There are two pools, two Jacuzzis, and a beach pool. It has a Balinese gazebo, lit tennis court, a patio for al fresco meals overlooking a waterfall that burbles through lush gardens and spills down into one of the pools.
If you're bored, there's sailing, water skiing, wind surfing, diving, banana boat rides, an aqua trampoline, sea kayaking, a DVD and book library, board games, and snooker. You can ask for an evening bonfire on the beach, with lobster tails served on fine china. Or burgers, tater tots, and Bud. Whatever you want, they got.
More of Richard Branson's paradise after the jump.
Plants grow in the halls (deliberately, yes.) None of the rooms have keys. Should you rent the entire place to yourself, you can hop from room to room, doing whatever lights up your freak fly. There's a place called "the love temple," which has a colossal bed on stilts for, well, reading, pounding quail eggs and caviar, and sipping Veuve Cliquot. Oh sure.
Speaking of champagne: The price tag includes as much bubbly as you can put away. You can have a competition to see who can come up with the best drink. The staff will make a floating bar and serve you shooters while you loll in the pool. A floating sushi bar - Japan meets the Roman way of reclined supping, only this meal can be served in the ocean.
Still feeling stressed? You can get wraps, massages, manicures and pedicures, reflexology treatments, eyebrow tending, and waxing. They'll even fly in a hairdresser if you need it, but for pete's sake, why? You're just going to ruin that expensive new afro diving into the pool, anyhow. It's hard to believe one would have to pay extra for the beauty and rubdown, but there it is.
But the best perk of all are the open-air showers and bathrooms.
Seriously, though. You haven't had luxury until you've sat on the loo, in the raw, looking out over your own private patch of cerulean Caribbean Sea. It's bare-bottom bliss at a top-dollar price.
[Photo: Josh Abramson]
Related Stories:
· Richard Branson [Jaunted]
· The Island that Virgin Bought [Jaunted]
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