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The HotelChatter Guide to Great Hotel Sex

Back To Story :: The Room :: The Amenities :: The Bathroom :: The Common Areas :: The Linens

THE ROOM
1. Headboards: There is nothing -- nothing -- more distracting than a headboard banging against a wall during sex. It's loud in your room, and it pisses off other guests -- thereby increasing the chances of a staffer knocking on the door and interrupting your exploits because of a neighboring guest's complaint. Headboards fastened securely to the walls like at Thompson LES (above) serve to best minimize (extra) noise.

2. Wall Thickness: And check out the wall thickness, too. As a general rule, if you can hear the television from the next guestroom or hear your room's television from the hallway, everyone's gonna be able to hear everything that goes down (or everyone that goes down, har har) behind your closed doors.

3. Lighting: And then there's the issue of lighting. Look for hotels with lighting that can be reached from the bed; it's sexy to be able to switch that bedside lamp off without a big fuss -- and notsomuch to have to get up and walk your naked ass across the room to flip a switch so you can navigate the room's unfamiliar terrain afterward. Plus soft lamps give ample opportunity for a little mood lighting action.

4. Spatial Layout: You need to pay close attention to standard furniture setup of the rooms, people. Space between the bed and the walls and the general arrangement of other pieces of furniture in the room is important for the sexual positions that require standing on the floor. We had a particularly painful encounter with the sharp corner of a desk once. Be careful. Or turn on one of those lamps.

Got your own suggestions for Hotel Sexytime? Put your somewhat-SFW suggestions here.